Against All Odds

What are The Odds?

I’m not as fit when I was 24. I smoke a pack a day and drinks casually. The only exercise I am on is 2 badminton sessions a week. I’m at 88kgs and have not lifted any barbell since my uni-days. Climbing the office stairs from 9th to 10th floor is a stiffling experience each time I do that.

And I forgot to bring some essential of items for the climb - my lucky charm, my spiked shoes meant for futsal, instant noodles & extra clothes At times, I was totally devastated and angry with myself not having to check and re-check my gear. Be paranoia, check your gear!

And my luck was not with me. My bag broke it’s harness at the Park HQ and my batteries went flat FAST during the final attack to the summit.

And I have neither a good sleep for weeks nor the mental preparation as my thoughts lie with the company’s business that will be effected with the current financial meltdown.

The mental preparation starts on the same hour when Ricky swing by early in a cab at 0610 hrs on 24/10 to KLIA. I realise I must not underestimate the climb.

I knew my odds recently in the office pool, it was 10 : 1 for me to make it to the top.

Getting to the Kinabalu Park HQ

Reached BKI after an uneventful MH flight with the another 11 fellow climbers - mostly my colleagues. A little introduction - Ricky at 55 years of age, Rahman my drinking buddy and wife Shirley, Suen Po and boyfriend James, Maya with her friend Mina, Helen the experienced climber of the lot who made it to Nagasari Peak in Nepal weeks ago, Sue Hwey who window-shops as exercise, Alex who went to Fitness First for the sole purpose to make the climb and our dive instructor, Lawrence. Our Chef’ de mission is none other than Helen Lim who have been dedicated in organising most of the arrangements and a seasoned climber on the Summit Trail.

We met up with our colleagues in BKI and had the most wonderful lunch - Sang Nyuk mee. Sorry Rahman, pork soup was much more satisfying than mee soto! Got to know James and Sue Hwey a bit better. Took some shots for the blog I am co-authoring too.

We bought things from a mini-mart that includes out staple diet - Cloud 9. What co-incidence, Super 9 consist of 9 staff from Reliance! I am not a sweet tooth but the caramel chocolaty taste sure pack a punch by providing the required energy. Bought a few tinnies of Guiness and drank it the same night too. Bought another 3 cans of Livita recommended by Lawrence for the climb.

The drive was quite interesting, for every 2-3kms or so in the 2 hour van ride to Park HQ, you see signboards staing there is a Catholic Church somewhere. It it when my thoughts went astray if I should be more faithful or should I join a theology classs rather than economics and make meself a pastor. Hah! Fat hopes.

We pit-stopped by at Nabalu Park and went into shopping mode. I am not into shopping but I love spending time and talking to the locals. There was this young mother with a 1 year old daughter named Princess. Same age with Abigail but she looks much more chubby. She’s a Kadazan Dusun. Helen got herself a bargain T-shirt at RM22 from RM38 as RRRP. Wanted to get one for Kelly too but I though since we’re heading back the same way, I might as well reserve some energy to lug the lousy piece of t-shirt around. It is nice, black baby tee with gold trimmings and letterings depicting Mount Kinabalu as a Unesco World Heritage site. http://whc.unesco.org/en/list/1012

Oh, did I mention that the Kinabalu Park is bigger than Singapore? That it is the largest, tallest and highest via ferrata in Planet Earth? That it has the largest collection of flora and fauna than the whole of Africa continent combined? That’s apart from that it has the largest flower and only place where you see a pitcher plant too. And yes, naturally it’s the highest peak in South East Asia standing at 4,095.2m and climbs 5mm every year due to the movement in the tectonic plates. Well nature is perhaps not my cup of tea, neither is macro photography too despite me bringing my trusty outdated Canon Rebel. I am more worried about the climb ahead of the team and me.


Land Where Fairies Dwell

We arrived after a short nap at the Park HQ to pre-register ourselves, cross check our names on our certificate (if we ever make the summit) and had an overview on how far we are going to climb.

Then we proceeded 1.5km to Fairy Garden Resort. The view from the room is simply breathless at 1,500m above sea level. How I wish Kelly and the girls are here to share this view. Some warm buttery scones and a cuppa earl grey would make it even better. However, sleepless people like Shirley, Rahman, Helen, Ricky and I choose to chat away in the resort’s restaurant. Gee, I did not even know what we spoke about - it must be something engaging because we had a couple of stouts and it carried on until dinner. Standard pricing for 375ml tinnies - RM8.

Helen gave us a briefing just before we dig in. Dinner was simple chinese fare (no pork) but sufficient for us to keep us in bed without the sheets.

The resort had a few swallow making their nest, one was just nestled just at my front door. I guess the owner had no reason to shoo them away. Bird’s nest anyone? This resort is basic. Comes with hot water and toilet roll. They do not have sufficient place to store our urban wear so we had to move them to the Park HQ at RM10 per piece of luggage the next morning.

Had a good night sleep as Ricky had another barritone extraordinaire singing in his ears. Had American breakfast and a Livita. Took some extra salt to avoid cramps. Uh, and the Sabah tea is excellent with 2 full teaspoons of sugar. You need those sodium and glucose - wah, recalling my chemical class terminology liao!

Bring our your winty and your brand new shoes!

I had on a singlet on and my badminton shirt. Shorts, socks and my newbie California sandals. I knew my physical exersion will keep me warm so I was not too interested in my RM79 windbreaker. The unwanted are left at the Park HQ. My backpack weights a mere 4.5kg. Light! I gladly shared the 10kgs minimum weight with Ricky for RM80 porter fees. He will take my backpack up to Laban Rata and down. In it I have a RM6 head torch, RM1.50 gloves, 1 towel, 1 pair of socks, 1 t-shirt, camera, lip balm, a cap, an undy, a runner’s pants, Snickers, Mentos, Cloud 9s, sunglasses windbreaker and supposedly my spanking new spiked futsal shoe.

After a few snapshots, purchase of tongkats from the bus driver at RM3 per piece (alway buy a big fat sturdy one that reaches your chest), weighing in, checking of names again (I dunno how Alex you missed this again) and distribution of passes - we went into the bus to move into Timpohon Gate about 1.5km away. Good! 1.5km walk waived!

Walter our chief guide briefed us at Timpohon on the trail and he was right to in his weather forecast that it will rain. Behind the group was another guide Vincent and the 2 porters - Ringgit and Rosie. Yes, a female porter standing at 5’ 3” - she is probably in her prime at 23 years of age. My useless backpack which I bought brand new for RM39 at Jucso coulds not handle its weight and the harness broke. Thankfully, Vincent who was carrying my bag is another McGyver like meself. (cheh!)

Helen the Goddess

Off we went Helen leading the way and I was somewhere in the middle of the pack. Then it began to rain. The 1st km up to Kandis Shelter was filled with unheard voices, “Why did you do this Funky? Are you mad? You are heavily panting and sweating, turn back while you are not too far from the gate - NOW...” The voices are telling the truth. I struggle on after 3 minutes at Kandis and headed onto Ubah Shelter. There I was already soaking wet (luckily not wearing any undy!) And waited for Vincent so I can puit my RM79 windbreaker on. I waited for a good 10 minutes but he’s still not here. Helen gave me her rain cost and I obliged this Goddess. Someone in our group puked and was in the verge of giving up at this stage. I urged him on.

It was sick voices again to Lowii Shelter for lunch. “Who would want to climb this mountain? You and your competitive spirit? How far can it get you? What do you intend to achieve my doing this? What and who are you trying to prove to?” Shrugging the voices off, I did my best to urge Lawrence, Alex and Mina who was struggling.

By the way, lunch was catered for by the Balsam Restaurant at the Park HQ. It was 100 Plus, bottled water, 4 pieces of sandwhiches, 2 spring rolls, an apple and a piece of fried chicken. It cost me additional RM8 to bring the lunch pack to Lowii. I had 2 pieces of sandwiches, 2 apples (one from Ricky Martin) and gulped down another Livita and 100 Plus. I need food on a consistent basis, not the quantity. The late comers are given applause to forge ahead. This is where the real men gave up their backpack to the porters as cramps and exhaustion kicks in.

There I returned the raincoat to Helen who obviously needed it more than me and I took my windbreaker from Vincent. At this stage, I was buck naked in except for the windbreaker. My singlet and t-shirt was just too wet. Wrong time to climb. The best period to climb I later understood was Jan to April. Sorry about the raincost Helen, there was a small tear and wind was just kept ripping it off - just like mad women craving for my body (hah!)

Speedy Gonzales

I moved on with James, Maya and Helen infront of me. I begin learning from Helen how to walk up a staircase - always choose the longest possible steps without lifting your legs too high on the stairs. Helen went slow and as I reached Mempening when I saw James and Maya removing their backpacks. “You should stop. Take a rest. Look at you, you need to sit and unwind, besides, you’re too fast” I bade them goodluck and surge ahead past Villosa and Paka Shelter. I took a break when I almost reach Waras Resthouse and admire the trail from above. Initially, I thought that Waras Resthouse was Laban Rata but to my dismay, another 300 metres. I was suffering from exhaustion when I reached the steps to Laban Rata resthouse at 2.30pm.

I opened the swing door like like a cowboy open the barn door to the saloon. Fellow climbers are busy exchanging stories. I was totally drenched as I walked up to the reception and register myself. I did not know I wasn’t staying therewhen I told them I wanted to check-in. Great! I’m early and I don’t have any clothes to change intoa dn don't have a single sen to buy me a cuppa tea or hot water at the very least. I found meself sitting across the barn door where I froze each time it opened. Took of my sandals and my mud soaked socks and knocked myself out for the next 30 minutes. Syuen Po walked in and I gleefully identify myself in the mad crowd of dozen climbers. She bought me a cup of hot water and I enjoyed every slurp. She told me that James and Maya was ahead. I was proven correct subsequently as I suspected they went all the way to Gunting Lagadan where we will be staying the night.

Nightmare after at Gunting Lagadan

The whole team trooped in slightly after 4pm where we waited for dinner to be served at 6pm. Thanks Shirley for the warmth of your clean sheets in your special room in Laban Rata Resthouse. Dinner was ample and sufficient. Bidding Rahman and Shirley adieu and promise to see each other tommorrow at 2.30am tommorrow for the final attack, we left for Gunting Lagadan where we spent a night in this no-nonsense “resthouse”. This is a bloody shack and it was filled to the brim. There I discovered that I did not bring my spiked futsal shoes and was pretty devastated. Then I called Rahman to order a pair of size 42 Fung Keong 100% Malaysian Rubber Shoe. “No 42 lar, largest one 40 niah”, quipped Rahman over the phone (Yes 012 works here - fooohbarrrrr!!!) Buy! Don’t care sh&t!

I had trouble sleeping after a buffalo wash (mandi kerbau) and got everyone to agree the lights off time is at 9pm latest. I checked my gear, had a smoke and got very worried about my if the FK shoe fits and I paced around the shack circa 10 pm. I had an anxiety attack. I was quite mad at Ricky flickering his headlamp above me on the bunker bed - I believe he was a bit worried himself too. Sorry Ricky-o. I was tossing and turning. The bed is awful. It’s small and the bed seem to had Mr Rhino and Ms Elle as guest before me - the middle of the bed is droops down.

Then I heard some rickety planky noises and check with Ricky what time it was. “It’s 1.45 and you can be awake now” Ricky chirped. I did not sleep. Or so I thought. Syuen, James and Ricky resounding said, “You slept the most lar!” Heheh.... I guess I was snoring away. What a give-away!

Prayers Answered by Shirley

James was put to duty by boiling the water and we had 4 noodles in the cups waiting for us - thnaks, you are such a trooper. Don whatever I have and marched out to the kitchen to have oodles of goodness. Went for a smoke in pitch black darkness while waiting for the gang from Laban Rata. I was pacing and my heart was racing, wondering if Rahman will ever bring the shoe and will it be the right size for me. I headed back into the room as the resthouse was now filled with anxiety filled climber. As I trodded back...”KC!” As I turned back, Shirley tugged me my FK shoe and a bottle of charged water. “Bless you Shirley!” And what do you know? Perfect fit!

Then Helen started to number us. It was Walter to go first, Maya, Sue Hwey. your scribe, Suen Po.... Etc” Ok, let’s do this as a team.

Like Rambo strampping on his piece, I did mine with my DSLR shooter. Turning on my headlamp and with my new found confidence, the 1st 50 steps up the stairways just outside the resthouse was horrendous. I had to have some water which Maya helped me carry. Sue Hwey was not doing too well. Despite our encouragement, she turned back. A little later I found out Lawrence had to turn back too. No shame in that bro.

Our pace was slow and we knew the the last 2.5km is ardous and extremely dangerous. The 2.5km stretch will have no vegetation besides some tough grasess and we will be on ledges of clift walls. Adding onto that, that fateful morning wind was howling mad and we were experiencing horizontal rain! The slope is slippery and we were bone wet and cold.

Worse Ever Climb Conditions

As much as possible, I encouraged my team along the way helping them eventhough I find it difficult to help myself. I reported myself Sayat-sayat the last check-point before the summit. While having a smoke in the crowded shelter, a guide who was sharing a light with me told me that he had not seen such bad weather in his 3 years of guiding. I am honestly very surprised that the Park Ranger allow us to go through despite the worse ever weather conditions.

NO, WE MUST GO and WE GO NOW

I wanted to wait for the group by Rahman asked me to continue and lead those infront. Walter was not in sight so I muster the group uphill - my gloves are completey wet by now and I know will will start to lose body warmth if I were to wait for the rest of the team, I had to move on, exert some energy and return some heat. Sorry guys, I just had to move on. And move fast. Despite urging the gang, some just could not move - so I did this favour to myself and moved on with Maya surging ahead past many fellow climbers who were in our way. Although we took our breathe every 20-30 paces but we were quick. After a good 20 minutes while taking a breather, Vincent caught up with us and briefed us on the scenario. He asked Maya and me to turn back with this worsening weather conditions. I was adamant and said a firm “NO, WE MUST GO and WE GO NOW” Picking my weight up not even wanting to look at Vincent, I pushed both Maya and Vincent up. Vincent was holding onto Maya hands and me just half a step back. Step by step we pace - no more than 1 feet each step we took. We huddled together everytime the wind howls past us or every 10 paces. Most of the time, I was shouting for breaks. Very vividly in my mind, Vincent had to shout BREAK or prolong the break period of 3 seconds.

I trudge each step of the way forward, following Vincent’s footsteps, never looking more than 2 paces infront of me. If I were to look, my heart will sink as there is a big boulder after this immediate boulder infront of me. It was scary but I knew if I were to give up so easily, I will fail myself - I have to reach the pinnacle, the summit.

There were times where Vincent took us away from the slower crowd and led us in the opposite. direction of the rope that serves as a guide. Looking back, I was quite amazed how my FK shoe held onto the steep slopes. We struggled each and every step of the way. Fighting cold, wind, fatique, thin air, horizontal rain that pounds on your face, wobbly knees, aching feet, collapsing lungs. I believe our minds are singular in objective that is to reach the summit at all cost.

The Final Attack

Closer now to the summit at 100 metres and still in pitch black, we started to see climbers coming down from the summit and moving downhill. A gwailo pat me on the back and said, “Not far, go on and fight”. Yeah man. Fight it and conquer it.

We saw the 50 metre line and looked up. Darn, dozens of climbers are on the way to the small summit lesst than 10 metres of real estate. Vincent got thinking and he asked both of us to follow him around the South approach where there is less climbers. Bigger boulders and more dangerous. Then... As I make my way up the 2 signboards....We made it! We made it!

I made it!

It was exhilirating and I can feel how Edmund Hillary felt when he conquered Mt Everest. Total bliss and satisfaction at 6.00 am on 26/10. Such joy. Besides, witnessing the birth of my daughters and my bungee jump in Skipper’s Canyon, this is the next best thing.

No time for feelings though. I took my camera out and started snapping away - as if there were great views. Zilch. The sun was not even up yet. I quickly plough a way for Maya to come up to the summit and started taking pictures. Also asked a fellow climber that our photos be taken. Very kind of them. Then dozens of climbers started muscling their way to the top before me and Maya hooked up with Vincent and found an alternative way down. We met Alex after a 30 metre descent and he was found panting away. Then James. Then Ricky who is trying to work the rope up to a steep boulder. Further down the south face, we saw Rahman, Ricky and Helen resting by a wayward boulder trying to defend themselves from the wind. I guess I left everyone there as I made a hasty retreat downwards powering a 2 hour descend down to Gunting Lagadan. Thanks Maya for storing my DSLR in your backpack.











Blistering Way Down an Even More Dangerous Stretch

On the way down, I was very concious about injury despite my power descent. Ask any climbers - most of the injury occurs when descending. I used a lot of ropes and used all my fours to manage this risk of freefalling. My toes hurt as the decline was steep, some at even more than 45degrees. Blister started to develop but I had no time to check. At Sayat-sayat, I checked out with the ranger and had a drink and a smoke compliments to the Bank Muamalat boys.

Then I literally ran all the way downhill “naked” with my FK supergrip. Upon reaching Gunting Lagadan, I strip naked and bath in hot water. To my dismay, the hot water ran out while I was checking out my blisters in the shower. Darn! My teeth was chatterring away (with no one to talk too!) while I put on my damp shorts and a blanket. Lawrence was awake and we chat. Thanks dude for the plasties and power bar.

Then came the rest of the troop half a good hour later. We had so many stories to tell. I chatted with Vincent and Walter and got to know them better. Just before breakfast at Laban Rata guesthouse, I gave my FK shoes to Ringgit our porter who had the same feet domensions with me. I no longer had any clothes. It was shorts, windreaker (no shirts again), sandals and tongkat all the way down after breaky. I went with Lawrence and Sue Hwey as they were fast in descending but they slowed down quite a fair bit. I’m sorry guys, I had to run down though raining - I’m in bitter cold!













Play Fast, Sleep Fast and Eat Fast

I reached Timpohon Gate at 2.30pm and played a dead duck. Slept for 30 mins and convinced the a bus driver for a free ride to the Park HQ and waited for the gang at Balsam while chomping down a bowl of pasta bolognaise.

The gang came down circa 4pm and it was reported to be true, there was a lot of injury while descending. James was helping Syuen Po and Maya was helping Mina. My utmost respect to James and Maya who cares for their friends. Hey! I will do the same if I am in thermal weather suits. Don’t bother asking if I will wait for my wife. Because it will be a cold day in h3ll before she even set foot in BKI!

Winding Down

We went back to BKI and bypassed Nabalu Park. Headed out for dinner at Oceans which is 100 metres of where we stayed. Promenade Marina Court methinks. Good seafood, cold beer and great company. Flew back after breaky with Lawrence the next morning while the rest of the gang headed to a Filipino market. Oh, I bought some oysters, scallop and sea cucumber from the airport T1. Cheap! RM133 for 2 kgs of seafood. This comes with promises to Kelly with a good meal with mne doing the cooking and washing - NOT!

A Humbling Experience

It has been a harrowing experience where Mother Nature can truly unleash it’s fury. Meseems a small bug living in the ocean where God taketh and giveth. A fact I will carry until my end of days.

I am humbled by the fact on how the locals makes their ringgits portering our materialistic comforts where they do not have too many. The little sharing of thoughts and candies with porters of 15 years of age reminds me of how easy I have got through school. My hats off to the guides and porters of Mount Kinabalu. Tabiks!

I hope that many will follow the footsteps of 50,000 who have succesfully scaled Mt Kinabalu and I am glad to be part of the number. I will challenge my kids to scale the heights and find out what sort of mettle they are made of. Will I do it again? Certainly not. I’m gunning for something more chalenging - like taking a dip in Poring Hot Springs or closer to home - gardening where my choice of beverage is just a few feet away in my fridge.

As to why I climb this mountain? Initially it’s because I have to find how far my mental and physical conditions can take me. Now it’s a mere joy of personal self-satisfaction.


Little meaningful thank you I want to express onto

Helen for loaning me her raincoat during the early stages of the climb. For her amplified responsibilities towards each one of us as a seasoned climber and our Chef ‘de mission. For her dedication to the cause and her superb organising skills.

Lawrence for his plasters for the blisters. And making us all look extremely good! Yeah man!

Sue Hwey for her Yoko. And making us look cultured as she do her laundry in Balsam Restaurant.

Maya for bring up my half bottle of water up the summit. And my shooter down to Laban Rata. Wonderful partner as usual in this climb as per our partnership in the badminton competition.

Suen Po for loaning me RM1 for the hot water I bought from Laban Rata while waiting for my porter to turn up with my wallet. And his boyfriend James who have been a trooper in our ghastly demands.

Shirley and Rahman for charging my water supply, buying that Fung Keong shoes and bring them up from Laban Rata to Genting Lagadan. You rock!

Alex for allowing me to think that Fitness First sarrk big time and it is of no use to run on treatmills. Sorry dude for leaving you to descend Sayat-sayat alone but you are too slow and I am freaking cold!

Ricky for loaning me RM10 each for the extra tip for my guide Vincent.

To my guide Vincent. Syabas! Kita berjaya! God bless you and your family.
Everyone helped each other. Like in any disaster, everyone throw in what they could spare and it tends to brings out the best in each person.

I also believe the common bond we have as Super 9 and Cloud 9 have made us more trusting on one another despite our ages, seniority and beliefs.

Mucho obrigato amigos!




Cammaderie

The following were fellow climbers I managed to chat up with.

Keningau trainee teachers - who would forget your doa selamat at Gunting Lagadan?
Bank Muamalat from KUL - for the smokes and water supply.
Post Malaysia Selangor - for making us look sooooo good!
Scottish climber complaints of the weather is worse than in Scotland!
Dutch printing firm - rah rah rah.... Unbelievable optimism.
Hongkong lady Candy who had no gear, no company and no will. Will not sleep with Lawrence again!
Japanese couple in their 60’s
Dissapointed young dutchman who took our photo in Laban Rata
Singaporean chap who shared a cigi after mine got all wet.

An obnoxious and moronic Stinkapurian who muscled his way into a shelter - shame on you! No bad manners should prevail in this sacred mountain.

Route via Summit Trail

Park HQ 0km
Timpohon Gate
Kandis Shelter
Ubah Shelter
Lowii Shelter
Mempening Shelter
Villosa Shelter
Paka Shelter
Laban Rata 6km -Waras Resthouse
Laban Rata Resthouse
Gunting Lagadan
Edge of vegetation
Summit 8.8km





Must Bring

Never lose your pass!
Everything gets wet down to the bone.
Bring a windbreaker (that comes with a hood). This replaces all needs for ponchos or raincoats which tears easily during the climb. Mine’s a South Korean made windbreaker at discount for RM79 at Sharafali’s that dries off easily. Real life saver.
A pair of gloves made in China, there is no nessity to dunk RM200 for a pair of thermal and wet resistant gloves.
A high quality haversack, the last thing you want is a broken strap. It does not really matter as the porter will be carrying your spanking brand new North Face haversack.
A pair of high quality California sandals for your descent from Laban Rata to Timpohon. Else you toes will thank you openly for it.
Knee support E-bene works the best for weak and wobbly knees when descending
Fung Keong rubber shoe with rubber spikes
Energy food - keep on eating, you’ll need it. Forget healthy energy bars like full grain, wholemeal etc. stick to Cloud 9, Snickers, Raisin, Livita, Mentos
Rehydrating oral salts to avoid cramps. Works wonderfully well.
Deep heat rubs (with something you can rub onto your body)
Headlight (got mine at RM3.80)
Shorts with lining (no nessity to wear underpants as it gets wet) that dries up quick like those from Arena.
Cap - reflective if possible. Wear the cap before the hood else your cap will fly off.
Don’t wear long johns. It will wear you down and slows your place down. Your exertion will keep you warm.
No necessity to bring your own toilet paper, creature comforts provided.
Don’t keep drinking water. It weighs you down. Take small sips at a lenghty interval, say 1 hour one sip.
Keep going. Your body is not your temple! It is a bio-mechanical humanoid, it will cool down once it is put to rest. Think about starting your car engine after you rested it in a cold winter.
Maxis works. GPRS only, forget about Edge, 3G and HSDPA. Celcom works too.
Keep your lithium iron batteries warm. Cold weather knocks off the battery fast. And place silica gel in your camera casing (if it matters at all).
Don’t shower. The surface of dirt and grime is a al-natural thermal insulator.
Everyone is filled with anxiety. Join the bandwagon - there’s nothing you can do about it and wait for the next climb.







Way of the Walk

Contrary to the belief of swinging your arms to get the momentum to move and to balance oneself), it will burn your precious carbs off quick. Keep you hands to yourself and keep the momentum up.
Walk small steps, do not step too high, find the right stone to step on to. 2 steps across the same step by walking from left to right rather than an upright upward step saves you precious energy. During the last stages of attacking the summit, breathe-in on one leg and exhale on your nest step. This drives consistency. Do not stop and sit. If you need to, stop for 10 seconds - standing.
Don’t stinge on porters. It’s worth every dime. Your 5kg bag will weight twice or three time the weight after just 1 km. If you plan to pass it onto your guide midway during the climb, you can do so. Still at RM80 per 10kgs.

Stick with your mountain guide for the last league of the climb. They motivate you. In my case, I motivated him despite the adverse weather conditions. (Hah!)

Fidget Widgets

Just a few days ago, my boss and his bosses were on the dinner table talking about the latest mobile phones and how we are to keep abreast with new technology. My boss knows well that I have always kept an eye on his TYTNII a.k.a TITAN a.k.a the Kaiser super duper PDA/Smartphone the first day he bought it. He suggested to the CEO that she should sell her mobile to me. She brushed it aside and said although it was not user friendly (she have the same phone), she must have the discipline to keep it for 2 years to ensure that the money paid for has served her purpose (whatever that means!).

While surfing my calender in my office this morning, my boss strolled in and gave me his HTC S730. Okay it's no TITAN but it's looks all brand new. Boy, was it a surprise! He showed me the reason, it was the Samsung OMNIA in his pocket! Dang.

Well, I told him if he wants the 2nd hand value back (and I was prepared to dig my slim wallet out), he said, "No need". Dang! What does that mean? Was it a gift? Is this a sign that he was trying to engage me and buy loyalty? Currently, I am working with my ex-boss (he's part time now doing some projects for my CEO) and he knows how involved I get with him. He also knows that now my CEO want direct feedback now from me instead of waiting for his sluggish actions.

I'm being too childish. My boss is not that kind of person that buys people over (but he is) or engage a person so that he favours him (saw him doing that before though) or induce someone to change his mind (which he does so convincingly sometimes witout you even noticing it). I have a simpler reason, he need me as his colonel. A colonel that works like a dog for such a measly pay, kick asses and leave his with the praises for the gangly regiment, a colonel that wades through thick mud and booby traps all over the boardroom. Honestly, I willingly and readily do his dirty job without much contention. Damn, I do not only deserve my monthly pay packet but this as a bonus too.

Oh and by the way the Dopod C730 which have served me well for 9 months was from him too! Hahah! It is a good phone and I am considering to give it back to him. In any case, I did exchange my Plam Treo for this C730 - should i give him back or sell it? The last time I check, the Dopod was fetching Rm350 on eBay. To me, it is worth a fair bit more like RM500. This I must consider over a few weeks (until then it becomes a feeble matter and I will forget about it altogether).

Ha! Notice the plural on the title? Yes!

It a white-boxed UK version of the Garmin 610 with Bluetooth capability. A discontinued model since launch in 2007 but I got it for a song! GBP110 including VAT. Bought it over the cyberspace and have it shipped to Bender's abode in Brimingham. Later it was hand-delivered to Ahpek's BIL house. Sent me to just before Hari Raya in time for my Sitiawan trip / holiday / my BIL wedding.

I have actually used Bender's unit before when I was travelling to SIN. Works fantastic and it is very accurate. To make it even more sweeter, Bender bought his unit at GBP150 (saving me 50 quid), I've also asked that Bender to buy me a pouch at 10 quids and a XD 4MB card at RM75. With that 4MB card, I'll squeeze in about 1,000 songs or 5 movies in MP3 format, can I?

So far the white-boxed unit worked fine despite Ahpek's feeble attempt to scare me of the worthlesness of the unit in Malaysia, his stunt roller coaster ride with loose pants containing the unit and his lack of response to my sms pertaining to my delivery of this unit. Ahpek, much obliged. Mucho obrigato amigo!

Thanks also to my bradder (who chooses to remain annonymous for fear of retribution by MALSINMAP)who was kind enough to put me through all the shit-load of guenea-pigging in purchasing, paying and getting it delivered. In anycase, if he had done any good, it was loading the GPS up with MAL SIN maps. Thanks bro!

Now that I am a confirmed widget nerd, I am now empowered to talk crap and shit down on you when it come to widgety gadgets.

Now if I can just configure my calender thingy and by the way, where the heck is the XD card slot har?

Vision 20 : 20

Kelly and I had breakfast this morning passing by Tan Chai Ho’s service centre in Jalan Ikan Emas. It was nailed close like a coffin. In any case, I don’t see Khalid Ibrahim’s service centre anywhere in Bandar Tun Razak. Where the fark is my MP anyway? He’s now the Menteri Besar of Selangor and now also my MP in KL too? How is he going to resolve our woes and effectively represent me in parliament?

I asked Kelly, “Will I be a good MP?” Without hesitation, she replied yes.

“Would you not think that I will accept bribes?”

“No, I don’t think so”

“Perhaps those bribes comes in millions!”

“Nolar, you sibeh honest wan”

That has kind of re-affirm me that I should be contesting somewhere and somehow for a seat under whatever banner. That’s the Malaysian spirit. Contest if the grassroot support is strong. Sure boh? The “grassroot” may be accepting another RM100 for voting for another sucker. Besides, my wife, my grassroot might vote against me. Who bloody hell knows?

That is what the Umnoputra thinks. Obtain so-called “grassroot support” where they got knocked down, then left rigfht centre by their own party members for losing by more votes than their own existing party members in the recently Permatang Pauh by-elections ie. There are indeed some Umnoputras who voted for the opposition.

Why did Anwar Ibrahim ask that his wife vacate that seat for his return? This is utter waste of the taxpayer’s money. Was he not supposedly to bite onto the Farkface Chinese boobswagger guy who taped Lingam’s place or Khalid’s MP-ship? Truth is, no one in PKR wants to hang on to thin air. They want something, some position, somehow for themselves. And it’s only human nature. Not only that, these 2 idiots do not want to surrender their seats to DSAI owing to their personal greed. Personal greed exist everywhere and in all parties and in all forms, me included. I want perks should I join politics, I mean real perks not like RM100 per diem. I want multi-million contracts which I can sub-contract it out. I want to buy expensive cars and live like a parasite too if an opportunity presents itself. Don’t you?

But I really doubt if I can really place myself into that sort of trap. This trap can mute a person like me. I would be reserved, not willing to speak up and act like a real mouse. How would one be effective if he’s on the take?

Before you go. Here, 20 for you, 20 for me.

A Case of Co-incidental Fasting

Okay I admit that I do sometimes feel like fasting with our Moslem friends to see how far my patience can actually stretch. It is common amongst faiths descended from Abe to fast, Buddhist monks to go on no food and water for days (yes, water for days) or even Mahatma Gandhi which have such will to ensure the Brits gets the idea they are not welcomed and get the fuck out of India. This whim happened only to me when the Moslems in Malaysia go fasting. This will continue to become a whim as long as my spirit does not have the will power. Put it another way, even if my sprit is willing, the flesh is not willing. I have to have uric and lactic acid build in my temple of trash.

Last weekend was a test of fasting of sorts. The gang and I decided to head out to Mid Valley to find some good deal on the home decoration fair – be it wallpapers or paint, wrought iron grilles to engineered wood. Dandily, we parked out car and just before I lock the car, panic struck me. I checked my wallet, there wasn’t a single ringgit in my wallet. Kelly took all the money out from my wallet for Sunday morning wet shopping at Taman Midah. Nope, no ATM cards as well. At that time I was prepared to use my credit card and have lunch but heck, what about the parking? I frantically search my super gay-pink coin pouch but I left it at home. Not even a single cent! Locked our car and sat ourselves silly and started to call my sister who is known to prowl this mall on weekends if they were coming. Nope, not today. I was truly stuck in Mid Valley with my family. Boy, I have not felt so stupid in many years now. The though of asking a retailer to charge more into my CC and taking a balance was also there but I thought that wasn’t too ethical and wonder if these retailers are willing to do so. I have decided to send a lengthy text message to my friend who would probably make a visit here. I must have sent around a dozen of them.

As I waiting for response, Kelly was so stressed up. Chloe have not had breakfast and Abigail was getting cranky. Kelly felt responsible for taking out the stash from my wallet but of course, she wasn’t to be blamed – I should have checked my wallet. Calls came in, first up it was my uni-mate, Ah Kow (yes, the dog, not a puppy but literally a biatch with testicles) called and told me he’s heading towards the Summit and will drop me some cash. Grabbed my first offer. I felt obligated yet a feeling of remorse as I seldom call him and when I do, he responded to my rescue. I’m a half-bred canine if he’s a biatch!

Next up was PuPPy. He sms-ed me and told me he’s heading my way. Well that’s before he threw some sarcastic remarks of how early I was shopping already in Mid Valley. Well that’s PuPPy for you. He had the foresight to text me if help was already on the way that I should text him back so he can go to his favourite haunt in 1 Utama. Yah, you biatch – high street shopping for this pedigree. Looking back if my wife had wanted to do shopping in 1 Utama and if I were to divert to Mid Valley, I would. Okay, you biatch – not such a great deal too. I would have done that for you too. *Snigger*

It was KPM a.k.a Mr Wong Yee Liang who finally called and said he will be there during lunch time with a friend. He was also closest to me in Sungei Besi having breakfast with his friend. I made sure that he was in no way have inconvenienced him, I took his offer and rejected both the biatches as they were still at home.

He finally came in a Proton Edar-stickered Waja in which I cannot miss and grabbed RM50 from him. Much obliged KPM. You have truly saved me and my family from inflicting more self-pity onto ourselves.

Of course, everyone responded. Each and everyone I text responded without fail. Some were late to repond and some were pitiful but everyone responded. For this I am forever so grateful and touched, even their thoughts counts. Thank you my friends.

Kelly and I shared the same thoughts. We are caught by the fact that we have not a single cent. We are deprived of buying an ice-cream for our girls, have a small meal or even pay for the parking. These thoughts of having no money was evident and so surreal. Our thoughts went hyperdrive and started to think about the poor family who had not even the means to have a proper decent meal, let alone the lavish things that RM50 can provide. We were humbled and our poor childhood crept in. Indeed we are remorseful on how we spend money treating ourselves mad. Even by putting it this way, it is an understatement. We should really count our blessings and make each day and meal count. For tomorrow we may never have it again.

Is this what we should be feeling when you fast? Being deprived of the things that you love to do? Eat, shop and sex too? I think it is. I have a new-found respect for the poor.

p/s BTW, we had McDonald with some cut-out McChicken coupons instead of Tai Thong dim sums and paid for the parking. To make you proud, we did not buy anything else!

Hands to Work And Hearts to God

Getting up the corporate ladder is not difficult at all. It's your continued consistency in behaviour and ability to stay on top that counts. That's performance I guess.

I have mulled over a couple of months now if I should go back to deputise my ex-boss in a subsidiary. Factors that prompted me to go back are as follows.

1. I do not wish to be part of the senior management team that do not think anymore. The culture is so bad that my current boss was almost sucked into it without him knowing it at all. Thinking is so much more an integral part of planning and a process that time and effort should be based on. As a result of "no think through" on the processes, the management loses focus, direction and the way forward. I cannot subscribe to this mentality and will not subject myself to be a yes-man. I believe that we must focus our efforts on the opportunities available but not ALL opportunities. Spreading resources thin, making too many staff multi-task on matters of feeble in nature, divesting in venture and forgoing where the bread and butter come from is too much for me to take and sink in.

2. I have fought the war with loonies for almost 5 years now. I need to seek greener pastures and more room to develop myself. Dealing with internal warlords is much much more difficult than dealing with an external client. I have given sufficient time for my boss to deal with his boss but he almost threw in the towel. It is not that I could not face the reality but heck it has been a lousy 5-year and I have been subdued from delivering my best.

3. Then there is Henry. My ex-boss whom was left in the lurch when it comes to finding his successor. I'd admit that I have learnt a lot from him as a taskmaster and he would continue to surprise me with his antics and his senility (Shhh! He does not take these words too kindly.) But I am sure that he is all so happy to receive me with open arms as he has no one to leave his legacy to. And he's a bloody tough act to follow in exceeding his profit target by 53% last financial year!

4. I guess I am going back to my inner nerd or becoming a "brick & motarian" instead of this online business. While I do admit the future of travel is online but I do get my own autonomous region to manage albeit a much smaller scope of currently what I am handling. (Talk about another warlord in his fiefdom!) But this would allow me to focus and go down on my hands and knees to tighten up screws with a motley crew of 70. I have worked with many of them before and there is also a gang which is young, bright, exciting and have the tenacity to run the extra mile or two.

The downside provided me some reservations not to move.

1. I would be labelled as "the guy who made it all the way to the top and fell all the way down". I am at the top of my game and yet I choose to dirty it all over again. The cyclical downfall is too drastic - making all the way up the corporate food chain and to reach down the limbo stick. The fact that I now occupy prime office space of 400sf and moving down to another half the size does creep in.

2. But most importantly, I feel sad that the company for not being able to utilise me to the best of my capability despite my capability and willingness to climb those peak and dive into the Bermuda Triangle. I feel that the company can actually do much better if realise their mistake earlier and made the positive changes at a quicker pace.

Or perhaps it is my mistake?

Perhaps I have failed to fathom the qualities of being a corporate raider and speak aloud when I was supposedly to be quiet. Perhaps I was too naive to voice out my intention to shift - I should have put up with it and stay in that ladder as long as my fingers can cling onto. Perhaps I should have sunk myself into the mentality of my bosses.

My rise was truly meteoric (yes?) 13 years and all the way there to the corporate office. Perhaps I should have stayed more sober and quietly presenting results which are favourable. Perhaps I was engaged by the retiring forces in the company that put me in a different perspective to view life after retirement and what the company has done for me and what now (after retirement) it will do for me. Too many suppositions, I suppose.

I have made the decision to move. Hands to work and hearts to God. I shall leave it as that for the time being.

Comedy Court

You are not so funny afterall. I have seen you chaps almost every year and you are tired, boring and Indy just had a heart bypass. : )

You've passed your time. Move on and show some really good satire and move away from politics. I have had enough of you. I'm bored larh...

Ghost in Avillion

I have lost count how many times we have stayed and visited Avillion, Port Dickson. However, evertime we visit it, it looks different and has something new to offer. This time, we went there on the 1st day of the Hungry Ghost month and it is said that the 1st Day is where the Gates of Hell opens it door and spirits are left to roam on earth.

I was in Admiral Marina in the afternoon for a meeting and brought the gang there. I left them at APD and came back in time for dinner. Kelly was not too happy about me leaving them for a meeting elsewhere.

Dinner was in PD town a few stone's throw away for the Pasar Malam. We had Curried Paku-Pakis, Stir Fried Sliced Fish with some vege, oysters omelet and ku-lou-yuk. Cost me about RM35. Those dishes can feed 3 adults but we were hungry. Very good meal, best I had so far in PD and without paying any tourist price. I will recommend this place to my colleagues next week when we have our HR Conference there. The place we had our dinner was a detached shop lot, not hygienic but Kelly was ready to put up with it. Family workers and the kitchen is in the front and full monty for all to see. The kitchen was relatively clean, I've seen much worse a kitchen before.

We bought some fish keropok, corn and a pair of RM10 sandals for Kelly. Cheap! I'd rather buy stuffs like that here than near the beaches or the hotel. We even went to the Store and have a look see. We kinda pity the shopowners as the business was appalling. Kelly and I tried to put our thinking caps on and see what sort of life we would have in a sleepy town like PD. No life! No shopping complex and I will turn into an uncle sitting at coffee shop with my legs on a stool drinking kopi-o-kow. Sorry mate, not my cup of tea.

We went back to our hotel and wanted to walk around taking some shots. Chloe was dying to go back to the hotel room and play Princess Bed and Abby was getting restless (and weighty too!) Nevertheless, we still managed to walk around and found a wedding taking place. 7 tables by the beach. This couple must have been bored with ties and shoes. Something similar to a gwailo wedding, they were walking kaki-ayam style. The MC was so cocky and wasn't much fun, at times he was just bordering nasty. The coupled must have done him wrong somewhat. So you single people out there who wants me to become your MC, you better think twice!

While taking some shots like these... (BTW, good hor?)

I took one that looks like this. Aiyoh, Kelly was so terrified that while I was driving, she asked, "I just want to ask lar hor... if you took any pictures of something that you shouldn't in APD" while on our way back to Mantin. What do you mean? I took pictures of people taking a bath? Gosh, have my of any sorts have not been fully revealed to my dear wife as yet?

Good gracious, what could it be? Haiya... ghost only niah....kekkekek... nothing my prayer or my exorcism acts could not handle larh.

Went back to Room 606 at the Cochin finger, whack a few green tinnies and I dunno what happen liao. I slept like a pig and a dog combined. I have always slept well in APD. The rooms are rebuild especially the wooden portion of it. New flooring, roof trusses, bed and wardrobe. they maintain them quite well though for other portions which are made out of tiles, bricks etc.

Woke up and finally saw the gym under construction, doesn't it look like a sore thumb jutting out in grey? I hope they will paint it.

A view from the balcony. My neighbour was trying to peep through and look at my 8 pieces of prime beef, albeit now all rolled into one big beer gut. Nevertheless, I think she was overwhelmed by my handsome voice. Bah, humbug... looks like rain is underway. It rained the whole morning. Kelly was undecided whether we should head out onto the beach before it pours or head out to the restaurant for breaky.

We finally decided to make a mad-dash to the restaurant located about 300m away and greeted with this...

...and this too...

Pity Kelly, she had to climb over it. Who does not dear? An earful again. Breaky was OK. Nothing fantastic to eat though. My sunny side up ended up in fried egg. But the cheese and nasi lemak was face-saving.

Nothing to eat? What is wrong with you daddy?

Abby enjoying her breaky. Can she eat or what?

We sat around and watch people. We saw some Koreans, Gwailos, Pak Arabs, Stinkapurians and Taiwanese. we're the only Malaysian there whacking nasi lemak. Nothing could dampen our spirits when the gang and I are together.

There was this chap who was busy sweeping the floor. Wonder why he did that despite the rain still hammering the side walk. Ah, it must be for the guests so the humpty-dumpty ones might not fall and APD will not get sued.

Raining mar...nothing to do so sleep on daddy's tummy lorh!
Finally, a break in the heavens for the lights to shine. Battle stations everyone! Swimsuit attire.

***My bags are packed and I am ready to go***

On da way to the beach...

Someone decided to gatecrash...
Swell time for my fountain for joy!

You think I might need some suntan lotion?
We quickly check out to reach mantin for lunch with Kelly's mom. We have had better holidays but this is probably the first for Abigail. Ghost or no ghost, we hope she had fun as much as we did.